Warning this post may offend and even anger some of you readers. Proceed only if you want to know and hear real truth. After all this is called Real Talk and believe me this post is real talk and will challenge some of you on what you’ve been thinking or have hear for years but will challenge you through the word. Again read on at your own discretion.
There is a teaching (I’ll call it a philosophy) I’m hearing more and more each year and that is the ministry or anointing and gift of singleness. The foundation for this teaching comes from I Corinthians 7:7-8: 7) For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8) I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I.
People have begun teaching that God has created some simply to be single based off of these words by the Apostle Paul. One of the things my mother taught me that I have held on to is that everything in the bible is true but everything is not true (I know some of you if you haven’t left are in your spirits condemning what I said already, read on and get understanding). What that essentially means is that everything that is recorded in the bible happened but it doesn’t make it a true statement. Here’s an example in the book of Job these famous words are uttered “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.” This is a statement that goes through out Christiandom but is a very untrue statement especially in the case of Job. The Lord did give to Job all that he had but did not take away anything he had. Satan was allowed (not even assigned) to attack Job and all of his possessions. So it is true that Job did make that statement. The statement itself is not true.
That premise in mind let’s go back to the topic of the ministry, gift, and anointing of singleness. In the verses you see that Paul himself is stating this as an opinion, his belief. As a matter of fact he (Paul) in verse 6 states that this he is stating as a matter of permission (meaning God is allowing him to make the statement) but it is not a commandment (a rule sent down by God). That opinion is that it is better to be single than be married when looking to do work for the Lord because their only concern is the things of God but when you are married your concerns are divided between God and your spouse. Paul’s reasoning is sound because as a married man, my job is to make sure that my family is taking care of and there are just somethings I can not do because I am obligated to my family that I could do if I was not married. I can’t and shouldn’t be out till 2 am on the streets trying to witness. I should be at home spending time with the gift that God has given me.
Where the teaching that people teach becomes unsound and foul doctrine is when they say comes from God that Paul again says is his opinion that some are given the gift (or anointing/ministry) of singleness. This is an unsound and dangerous teaching. From my experience this doctrinal teaching usually comes from a woman who can’t get a man because she refuses to let go of her past hurts and deal with herself as well to be in position (read 2nd post for what it means to be in position) to get the man God has for her. Sometimes it comes from a woman who has a man but is unhappy in her marriage because she didn’t wait on God nor walk through the Ester like process of preparation to obtain the promise of God. Or it may even come from an older man usually who is married and has forgotten what it was like to be single and hear God concerning getting a mate so rather than teach right they all will teach that some are just meant and created to be single. This is a teaching that is anti-Godly. In other words it is not in God’s eternal plan so it shouldn’t be taught. Prove your point Jesse! I’m glad you asked me to.
In the book of Genesis, after God created Adam we find that Adam had been given instruction to care for and dress the land that God had placed him on. Adam was commanded to give names to all the animals that God created but while Adam was naming them he saw that each had a partner, everyone accept him. The bible declares in Chapter 2 verse 18 that God spoke and said it is not good that man (man not Adam, which means all of mankind, meaning Adam and all that were to come after Adam) should be alone. So out of the rib of Adam God created woman as a help meet for him to be with him to share with him. Now my question is that why if God said in Genesis that it is NOT good that man should be alone, why would he then create people to be alone. Now before some of yall get all super deep on me and say God isn’t talking about marriage he’s talking about being by himself. If God was talking about it’s not good that man should be by himself he wouldn’t have taken the rib from Adam and purposely imperfecting a perfect work to create woman. See man is only complete and perfect when he has his rib because then the 2 are 1. Because it takes man (the body) and woman (the rib) to make a perfect body. God took a piece of Adam from Adam so that he wouldn’t feel right without woman. Adam was created in the image of God, woman was created out of man. Woman should long for her home (inside man as his rib, his support, his help meet) like man is supposed to long for his home (in God). We are created to be inter-dependent beings. Dependent on one another as outlined by the analogy of us being all members in the same body and the eye not being able to say it doesn’t need the foot (Romans chapter 12) or as outlined in a marital situation with Adam and woman (Genesis chapter 2). There is no one who can operate effectively by oneself. Even Paul had help, now he wasn’t married and did a great work but I promise you (and every happily married real man will and can tell you) a much greater work can be done when you have God’s gift in a spouse standing by your side.
The problem is we are lazy teachers and Christians. We don’t want to do what it takes to get all that God has for us. We are too lazy to stop pointing fingers at everyone else and start looking at ourselves. Ladies the reason you can’t get a man is because you, yes you. You are the problem, you aren’t prepared, you aren’t seeking God properly and with right motive, you are dealing with your issues and allowing God to deliver you from past soul ties and hurts. The moment you get honest and have a real talk with yourself, the moment you work on the things that you don’t want to touch will be the time that you can begin to see God preparing you for your husband. Men, oh men, you tired trifflin men. The moment you begin to deal with your past issues and get the crap out of your head about this perfect woman you want with all her freaky tendencies and have real talk with yourself that you aren’t perfect and being to work on being a man instead of a man trying to capture an imaginary youth that never was. The moment you begin to seek God and ask Him how to be a man and what the weight and responsibility is of a man is the moment God can release His gift of woman to you. But until you women and you men truly do that and truly seek God about your issues (not the issues you think others have because everything is their fault and nothing yours) you will never have the gift that God has in a spouse for you and you will be alone and bitter. Because the truth is that most people who teach and receive this garbage of a doctrine have a root of bitterness in them and rather than uprooting it and destroying it they to justify it by teaching something the God never intended. The time for false foul doctrine is over. If you are single, it is not the way God created you but rather it is a status that God is trying to use to prepare you. He wants to show you how much He loves you and one of the ways he does that is by placing you with someone that will show you (not just sexually) what true love is. Prepare yourself and allow God to take you through the process that will take you from single to married in order to help prepare you to receive in full the love that God has for you. Is it easy, NO! But it’s not easy because it goes against the grain of the Prince of the Power of the Air (Satan). He has taken what God intended and twisted it and perverted it such that it is unrecognizable in the sight of God and the biggest indictment is that we receive this evil mess as if it was holy. How can one in a Godly way be fruitful and multiply if God intended you to be single? Why would He say it isn’t good that man be alone if He created some to be single? Take off this unholy garment and put on the garment of righteousness. Know the truth, that God has a plan for you and it does include a spouse all you have to do is truly receive it and prepare yourself to receive it. Know the truth and allow it to set you free. That my brothers and sisters in Christ is “Real Talk” grow in God’s grace and abide in His love. I know that you probably will have comments and questions (mostly angry comments I imagine) please feel free to send them to me at jesse.jones@highpraiseministries.com. I look forward to hearing your responses.
